"I went to the woods because I wanted to live deliberately. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life;
to put to rout all that was not life and not when I had come to die, discover that I had not lived." ~Henry David Thoreau

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Just Those Few Weeks

For those few weeks I had you to myself. And that seems too short a time to be changed so profoundly.

In those few weeks I came to know you and know your spirit. I loved you. You came to trust me with your life. Oh what a life I had planned for you!

Just those few weeks- when I lost you. I lost a lifetime of hopes, plans, dreams, and aspirations...and a slice of my future simply vanished overnight.

Just those few weeks- it wasn't enough to convince others how special and important you were. How odd, a truely unique person has recently died and no one is mourning the passing.

Just a mere few weeks- and no "normal" person would cry all night over a tiny and barely begun baby. Or get depressed and withdraw day after endless day. No one would, so why am I?

You were those few weeks my little one. You darted in and out of my life too quickly. But it seems that's all the time you needed to make my life so much richer and give me a small glimse of eternity.


Amy said...

Veronica! I am SOOOOOO sorry about your sweet little baby! I hate that you had to become a member of the club although I welcome you with open arms! Please call me if you ever need to talk. Our thoughts and prayers are with all of you and if you need anything PLEASE let me know! On a happier note, I absolutely love your family picture. You guys are such a wonderful and beautiful happy family and you deserve nothing but the best. Like you said you will meet this sweet little spirit later and I truly believe that! The timing just wasn't right. (no matter how much you wanted it to be....so frustrating) I love you tons and will be thinking about you often! (P.S. you really should write a book or something, you are an amazing writer and really know how to express yourself so that others can feel what you want them to feel:)

Living My Dream said...

I feel those words to the bottom or my soul... I feel so much like you right now and my heart breaks for us both. Though this wasn't the first for me, it feels more real, more painful this time. The other times I didn't feel the baby's spirit the way I have this time, and I wonder at moments how I can go on, how I can keep breathing. I am told that in time I will understand, and I know those words are true... but I don't have to like how it turned out for either of us, I don't have to like the pain that is in my heart. It seems so silly that somebody that we never even got to hold could have such a huge part of our hearts... the atonement is real, of that I am sure, so I guess I need to wait and trust that my burden will be lifted. But how hard it is to be 'human', mere mortals right now...to have to wait on the Lord to heal the hurt. Will be praying for you, and me...that our hearts will mend quickly and that we may have understanding beyond our own to accept 'His' will, not our own.